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英文简历中避讳的话

2010-06-05 10:59:09 来源:中国鞋网 中国鞋网 http://www.cnxz1.cn/

  致命的大错

  "Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10." 

  "Qualifications: No education or experience." 

  "I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy." 

  "My compensation should be at least equal to my age." 

  "Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC." 

  "Fired because I fought for lower pay."

  "Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 65" . 

  "Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date."

  "Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near."

  "Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate privately." 

  打字错误与语法错误 

  "Here are my qualifications for you to overlook." 

  "Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer." 

  "I am a rabid typist." 

  "Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981." 

  "After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work."

  "Accounting cleric." 

  "As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments."

  "Suspected to graduate earlynce analyzing investments."

  "Suspected to graduate early next year."

  "Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets."

  "Proven ability to track down and correct erors." 

  "Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department." 

  "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details." 

  "Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school." 

  不应有的幽默

  "Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house." 

  "Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting." (Translation: Short-order cook.) 

  "But wait...theres more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature." 

  "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse."

  "My fortune cookie said, Your next interview will result in a job-and I like your company in particular." 

  "Title: Another resume from the Profiles in Excellence series."

  "Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it."

  "Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks."

  "Lets meet so you can ooh and ahh over my experience." (来源:应届生网)

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